Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Another lesson in letting go

Well, last Tuesday my sweet girl began her new life as a full-day kindergartener. She woke up that morning with a huge smile and an enthusiastic "Well mom, today is the day!" To say the transition was easy for her would be an understatement...Lily was READY! I however, had a tougher time with the whole thing. We walked to school as a family, and I fought back the tears the entire way. I would've been a blubbering mess, but I had cried so much the day before that I think I was a bit dried up. As she walked beyond the doors of her school, out of my sight, and out of my care, I whispered the same prayer that I had offered up so many years ago. While we waited to travel to China to get our angel girl, I used to pray to God that He watch over her while I couldn't...and I found myself asking Him to do that for me again. I trust that He will, just as He did before, but my heart has a hard time letting go. I worry about her tiny little self getting lost in the shuffle with so many kids, and so few teachers. But, as the days progressed, I found myself liking this new adventure. Lily had so many fun stories to share after her day, and I was confident that she was going to be just fine. She was in class with her buddies Nnamdi and Ben from pre-school, and even Wyatt from across the street was with all of them. It really couldn't have been more perfect. Her teacher sent home a note after her first day saying how great Lily had been, and commented on how friendly she is. I beamed with pride. She made a new friend named Sadie, and when I asked her what she looked like her reply was the following run-on sentence:"She has curly hair, today she wore a pink shirt, and when we stood in line she rubbed my hair very gently and it felt good." What more could a momma ask for? I breathed a big sigh of relief and began to enjoy my quiet days with Devin. (who, by the way, is the best baby on the face of the earth.) Then yesterday I got a phone call from the principal of Lily's school saying that due to the over populated classrooms, they were pulling 8 students from the kindergarten class and putting them in a K-First split. Now, because Lily scored so well on her evaluation, she was one of the students chosen to make this change. Just when we had all settled in, there was yet another transition to be made. The switch is taking place tomorrow, and when I told Lily about it, there were many tears. (from both of us). But, she quickly regained her composure and assured me that she was fine, and would give it her best shot. I'm more proud of her than I can even explain. Not just for being bright, confident, and friendly, but for coming SUCH a long way in the area of "going with the flow". Anyone who knew my daughter as a baby/toddler knows that she was not at all good in this area, so to see her rolling with the punches like a champ just makes me so happy. Jay and I truly feel like we are blessed with the most amazing kids ever. We don't take them for granted for a minute...we actually still walk around pinching ourselves most days. So, although it is hard for me to let go as Lily develops into this independent little girl, I know that she is becoming the person that God has created her to be...and with her help, I am becoming the woman that He has created ME to be.